Easier to Run
by Klutzygirl33
Summary: Amelia doesn't understand what he sees in an addict like her, so she runs. Set a few months in the future. Amelia/Sheldon


**Disclaimer**: I don't own Private Practice and never will. No copyright infringement intended.

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><p>Amelia Shepherd's known for a while that Sheldon Wallace likes her, but she didn't say anything because she wanted to be clean first. She wanted to get her life back on track before anything happened. But now Sheldon's standing in front of her and telling her he's in love with her, and she doesn't know what to do.<p>

Amelia doesn't understand what Sheldon sees her in addict like her. How can he love her? She's nothing but a fuck up, and so she told him so.

"Amelia, I don't think that. You've had your problem yes, but we're all screwed up in some way." He's smiling at her, and now she's panicking.

She started crying, which is a reaction she didn't expect at all. "I'm sorry." Then she fled back to her office to have some privacy and cry in peace.

Violet strolled into the room about ten minutes after that. "Sheldon sent me, said something about how you might need me. What happened? Something to do with a relapse?"

Amelia shook her head. "Sheldon told me he loved me and I freaked out."

Her mouth dropped open. Violet had suspected Sheldon's feelings for Amelia – Pete had too – but she hadn't expected them to be true or for anything to happen. "Wow. So, I'm assuming you ran out on him?"

"Yes. God, I'm a fuck up. Sooner or later, he's going to realize that I'm not the right person for him and everything will be screwed up. If it isn't already fucked up anyway. I can't do this. I can't ruin Sheldon." Where was all this fucking angst coming from? Amelia hated it – She had experienced that feeling a lot during her downward spiral. However, this time, she didn't feel like turning to drugs or alcohol. She just wanted to run.

"I'm sure you didn't ruin anything. It was just a shock. Why don't you go in and talk to him? Explain your feelings."

"Fuck that." Amelia glared at the therapist.

Violet laughed. "Just think about it, okay?" Then she turned around and left.

An idea began formulating in Amelia's head. She needed a few days to think and be away from Sheldon because she knew he could convince her of reasons why they'd be good together. And she wasn't ready for that. So she decided that she was going to Seattle to visit Derek. She hadn't met her new niece yet. It'd be nice to see Zola.

She thought about taking Addison with her, but the doctor was six months pregnant with twins and probably wouldn't want to take a trip. Plus, Amelia wasn't about to put up with having to stop every ten minutes so Addison could go to the bathroom. No, she was going to do this alone. However, she was going to tell someone so they wouldn't panic.

After telling Addison of her plans (and skillfully avoiding Sheldon), Amelia went home and packed for a weeklong trip. She was on the road within two hours.

After several hours, she arrived in Seattle and soon pulled into Seattle Grace Mercy West. Amelia hadn't called her brother to inform him of her impromptu visit, so this was going to be quite a surprise to Derek. She couldn't wait to see his face.

"Hey, Amy!" Derek didn't look shocked to see her in the least.

She deflated. "Addison called you and told you I was on my way, didn't she?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Derek! Anyway, where's my niece? I want to meet Zola!"

Derek didn't know why Amelia was visiting; only that it wasn't related to her addiction issues. He was happy to talk about his daughter though, even if it was a stalling tactic from his sister. "She's with the nanny at home, but Meredith gets off work soon. You want to go with her?"

"Sure."

"So, you want to tell me what's up or avoid this some more?"

"I'm going with avoiding it some more. Not ready to talk about it yet."

"And it's not addiction related?" He had been shocked to find out that his sister had relapsed a few months earlier in a phone call from Addison.

"It's not. I can definitely promise you that."

"Okay, good." He finally hugged his sister, and then had to rush off to do an emergency consult. Amelia wandered around the hospital for a little bit, during which she ran into Mark and he kept showing her photos of his daughter, Sofia. She thought the baby was adorable, but after a while it bored her so much that she was happy to run into Meredith.

"Thank God you found me. I don't know how much more I could take of the pictures. The baby's cute, but no thanks." Amelia cringed after she said that because the same thing was probably going to happen with Zola.

Meredith laughed at her sister-in-law. "No problem. Let's go see my baby." Amelia followed Meredith home and watched as she dismissed the nanny for the day. She got to meet and play with Zola for a few hours. When Derek came home, it was time to eat dinner and no one could agree on anything, so the three ordered pizza.

"So are you ready to tell us why you're really here, Amy?"

"Nope. I just want to enjoy time with my brother, my sister-in-law, and niece." Amelia would probably tell them soon, but she still wanted to avoid the Sheldon situation for a little while longer.

She was there for three days before Derek finally had enough and cornered her. "Amelia, please tell me why you're here. It's obvious you don't want to talk about it, but tough. Talk to me."

Amelia sighed. "Fine. There's a doctor at the practice, a psychiatrist at the practice. And we're friends. He tried to help me when I was falling apart. The other day, Sheldon told me he was in love with me and I panicked. That's it."

Derek sighed, too and then rolled his eyes. "So you panicked because you're in love with him?"

"What? I didn't say I was in love with him. Are you insane?"

"Amelia, you're in love with him, too. Otherwise you wouldn't have run. You didn't have to go all the way to Seattle."

She struggled on what to say, but ultimately settled on the truth. "I'm a complete and utter fuck up, Derek. He's nice. Sheldon wouldn't be able to handle me eventually, and then he'd leave. That's the way it works. I'm not good enough for him." Why was Amelia sharing this with her brother?

"Oh, you suck at being in love don't you? The same thing happened when you were fifteen and fell head over heels in love with Veronica Tate."

"Oh, Veronica. I haven't thought of her in a long time."

"Don't change the subject. He loves you in spite of the fact that you're fucked up. I don't even know the guy, and I tell. Give this relationship a chance. And you're in love with him."

"Fuck, I am in love with him." Why hadn't she realized that sooner?

He smiled. "Go and tell him. Explain your issues because it's not that hard, Ame. I'm sure everything will go well. Now get your ass back to Los Angeles and tell him."

"Fine. But I'm blaming you if everything gets screwed up."

"Okay." He hugged Amelia and then sent her on her way. Amelia went back to Derek and Meredith's house to pack her stuff up, said good-bye to Zola, and then reluctantly started heading back home to LA.

It was a little late, so she went home instead of the private and started thinking. How long had she been in love with Sheldon? Was it a new thing, or something that had been happening for months? A course that Amelia hadn't been able to see because of her issues? She didn't know, but she was going to tackle the situation in the morning. Avoiding it some more sounded like a good thing.

In the morning, she took a really long shower and then reluctantly went into work. "You're back!" However, Addison didn't sound surprised at all.

"I'm back. Is Sheldon here?"

"Yeah, he is. You going in to talk to him?"

Amelia nodded. "Yes."

Addison squealed and then hugged her, which was a little uncomfortable for a few reasons. Amelia walked slowly to Sheldon's office, avoiding Pete rolling his eyes at her.

"Oh, you're here." Sheldon had been gearing himself up for rejection for several days now, and it seemed like that was about to happen.

"I'm back. And I'm terrified, but I'm not going to run anymore."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I'm in love with you too, Sheldon Wallace. I think I have been for a long time now, but I'm not sure."

"Is that why you bolted like a bat out of hell?"

"Yes it is. I don't understand why you feel this way about me. I'm a fuck up, an addict, someone who's ruined her life for as long as I can remember. Why would you want me? I'm not worth the effort."

"Amy, why are you saying this?"

"Because it's true! Don't you see it?"

"No, I don't! I see a woman who cares a lot about her friends, who realizes she has issues and doesn't shy away from them. Amelia, you're a good person. You're nice and sweet and sarcastic as hell, but that's what I love about you. I'm not going to bolt just because I see that you're not perfect. You are worth the effort. And I don't care if you're a "fuck up". We're all screwed up in some way."

"Wow, that was a lot to take in."

"Amelia."

She rolled her eyes, and then started beaming. "I'm in love with you, too, you idiot. And that was so sweet I want to throw up, but I think we can do this. I'm ready to be in a relationship with you. You ready for me, Sheldon?"

"Of course I'm ready for you."

"So are you going to kiss me or leave me hanging?"

He laughed, then strolled over to her side and then planted one on her. The two made out for a few minutes, unaware they had an audience. Sheldon had forgotten to close his blinds, so their friends had eavesdropped.

They pulled apart when they heard Addison squealing in excitement. "Sorry, sorry. Just really happy for you two," she explained when Amelia walked over and opened the door.

"It's about time, really." Pete clapped Sheldon on the shoulder and then walked away to go get something to eat.

"I'm thrilled for you both." Violet hugged them both and then also walked away.

Their friends soon left, and then Amelia and Sheldon were finally left alone. "So, I guess we're going to have to deal with that all the time." She was still smiling, however, and couldn't stop.

Sheldon leaned over and kissed her again. "Eh, they're nosy. We've always known this, and we can put up with their questions. Nothing is private around here."

She laughed. "You are right about that."

Amelia and Sheldon were an unconventional couple, but neither one cared about that as long as they had each other. They were good for each other, and everyone knew they were.


End file.
